Special Guest Expert - Wendy Nash

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Special Guest Expert - Wendy Nash: this mp4 video file was automatically transcribed by Sonix with the best speech-to-text algorithms. This transcript may contain errors.

Brian Kelly:
So here's the big question. How are entrepreneurs like Us who have been hustling and struggling to make it to success. Who seem to make it one step forward, only to fall two steps back, who are dedicated. Determined and driven. How do we. Finally break through? And with that is the question. And this podcast will give you the answers. My name is Brian Kelly. And this is The mind body business. Hello everyone and welcome, welcome, welcome to the Mind Body Business Show. We have another fantastic episode lined up for you here tonight. I cannot wait to bring the amazing Wendy Nash up onto the stage. She is waiting in the wings right now. Ready? Ready. She's ready to come on. Before we do that real quick, the mind body business show it is a show that I developed with you in mind, the business owner, the entrepreneur looking to make it that one next step or even more ahead in your business and even in your life. And what I do is I bring on successful entrepreneurs from all over the world. And by the way, Wendy comes by way of Australia near Brisbane. So this is an amazing, amazing, fun time we live in that we can do this in real time. And I love to bring on these amazing guests like Wendy, because when they come on without fail, they will reveal their quote unquote secrets to success. And there's really no secret to it. It's just knowing what to put into your life, when and how to do it. And then you can then simply model, which is simply a fancy word for copy. You can simply model what they're doing to achieve success faster rather than try to reinvent the wheel, which takes a lot more time. So what if you could take two years to reach success versus ten years if you're trying to do it on your own? That is what the Mind Body Business show is all about. And those are the three pillars of success. It's about mind, which is mindset. And I've interviewed and studied and read successful people for a good decade, and I dedicated to doing just successful people.

Brian Kelly:
And what I found were those three pillars kept bubbling to the top and to a person, each successful person I studied had that mindset. What mindset are positive, productive and most importantly, flexible? Flexible mindset and body. Body is literally because each of these individuals took care of themselves physically and nutritionally and then business that is so multi multifaceted. We'll have some great chats with that, I'm sure, this evening with Wendy Nash because business in order to build a thriving and successful business and then scale it beyond that, one must acquire and master various skill sets that are necessary to do just that. Skill sets like sales, marketing, team building, leadership, systematizing. I could go on for quite some time. The good news is you don't have to actually master every single one of those by yourself. In fact, if you master one of those that I mentioned just a moment ago, then the rest can literally fall into place much simpler. And that one skill set is the skill set of leadership. Now you might be thinking, Well, Brian, I don't have a team yet. I'm a solopreneur. Nothing wrong with that. So practice the skill set of leading yourself. There's always opportunity to improve yourself in the realm of leadership. And speaking of improving and amazing entrepreneurs, another wonderful trait I found out about the successful the most successful out there are. They are also very avid readers of books. And with that, I want to quickly segue into a little segment I affectionately call Bookmarks.

Announcer:
Bookmarks and to read bookmarks. Ready, steady. Read bookmarks brought to you by reach your peak library.

Brian Kelly:
There you see it. Reach your peak library. And a real quick word of advice for those of you watching live, even if you're listening on podcast. I would implore of you to rather than want to go click away and go check out these resources because I'll guarantee you Wendy will have several is rather than do that is to write them down and then visit them after the show is over. Because like I like to see from stage all the time, the magic happens in the room. And what does that mean in this sense? Well, you could be watching the show, listening to the show, but then your attention is diverted when you type in another URL, another website, something you want to go visit. And at that moment, it could be the moment that Wendy Nash says that one thing that could change your life forever and you may miss it. So just keep your focus and gaze on the show while the show is going. And then after it's over, you can go visit those resources because you have written them down. So reach your peak library is no different. So reach your peak library, go ahead and write that down and then visit it later. And what that is, is simply a website that I had my team put together as a result of my own library of books that I have personally read and I vet. Now, the thing is, I did not read very voraciously. In fact, I didn't read at all. I mean, literally no books until about the age of 47. I read some in school, but I think you know what I mean. Nothing about business or anything like that. And then I began reading voraciously and discovered it really is life changing. And so I started putting these books together and say, these are the ones that were impactful to me personally in my business or my personal life, or even both. And so I just put in only those books that have had a great effect on me and things. There's a lot of things in these books as I see them scroll by that have that I've put into action that have literally catapulted my business over time.

Brian Kelly:
So that's there for you as a resource. Look, it's not there to make money if you find a book and you'd rather go to Amazon, which well, every one of these buttons go to Amazon, but if you'd rather go there yourself and go find it there, I'm fine with that. It's just a way, a resource for you to have the ability to find a book and cut down the possible error in reading a book that maybe might waste your time. And that's what it's there for, to help you optimize your time and be more efficient and to be amazing. Speaking of amazing, I think you know what that means. It's time to bring on the one, the only. Wendy Nash. Let's do it. Here she comes.

Announcer:
It's time for the guest expert, spotlight. Savvy, skillful, professional, adept. Trained. Big league qualified.

Brian Kelly:
Yes. And there she is. Ladies and gentlemen, Wendy Nash.

Wendy Nash:
Whoo hoo hoo! Thank you. Fantastic. Welcome. It's exciting. It's really nice to be here. And thank you very much for having me on the show. It's really I'm really looking forward to this show. This is. This has been really fun. And I really there are two things I always like to do when I start a show. And that is first to say thank you for allowing me to come on to your show. And it feels it just feels really lovely. You've been an amazing host so far. And what people don't know is that we've actually been. Chatting and getting to know each other for about half an hour. So that is actually something I haven't had before. There's a huge amount of prep that Brian does in in this. And so I just want to kind of give a bit of a heads up, not only to Brian and also that. So when we book this call a couple of months ago, I was looking for a camera and then right at that time he says, get this camera. And there's like there's so much sort of whittling and tweaking of things that you have done and your team and also your community just brings something, you know, even if it's just a download of the numbers and or talking with somebody or something, you heard and maybe you do it slightly different next time. All that sort of is included as part of this program. So thank you to all Brian, his team, also to the community. And I also want to. Say thank you to Juliette, who's my. Creative manager, because she's the she's my kind of go to person on my side. So and my partner, there's a whole lot of people who are part of this great big thing. So thank you very much for everybody for making this happen. And the other thing I like to do is I like to really honor the land that I'm calling from. So it's an Aboriginal tradition in Australia, I'm calling from Queensland and there is a really important process which is to acknowledge where I am and I'm calling on from Gabby. Gabby country and the Aboriginal people have been here for 30, for 70, 70,000 years.

Wendy Nash:
So it's so Christianity, it's 2000, Buddhism, it's two and a half. This is 70,000 years, that's 35 times. So it's like what, two years, 2000 times by. You know, to the power of something. And it's really not until, you know where you've come from that you can say, this is where I am. And you know what? This is where we're going. Everything is part of the larger picture, including the community, including what we've appreciated and including what's crashed and burned. Like everything is about observing, changing, noticing where we're going. Well, noticing where we're not going well and thinking, you know what? We can do it slightly different. So anyway, thank you very much and I love your your book thing. I thought that was great and well while that was on and I was in the background, can I give a recommendation of some four books that I really loved? Am I allowed to do that?

Brian Kelly:
Absolutely.

Wendy Nash:
All right. So I have written any of these books, but these are personally books that I have found really, really fantastic. One is a book called Rapport The Four Ways to Read People by Emily Allison and Lawrence Allison. And they are forensic psychologists who have evaluated interactions with terrorists and criminals with the police, and they've got a forensic style to it. And this was like, I've done a psychotherapy training, but it missed a really clear thing. And I thought this book absolutely nailed it. So this is the book. It's called Rapport, and it's just an absolute standout book. So that's that one was a real game changer for me. This other next book is a book called Cover Your Ass Online, which is an Australian author. And it's a super simple it's a guide protecting your online business assets. And I think it's perfect for entrepreneurs. It's Jeannette Chickens and I was given this as a freebie, as a as a start up entrepreneur weekend thing. And I thought, Oh yes, just one of those free books where I don't care, but it's absolutely fantastic and it's short. So each, each paragraph goes to the legals and the social media and stuff like that. So that's a really fantastic book and it's Australian. So I like to promote that. This is, these are two books by the same author and this was because I was prepping for another interview and I read one of the previous hosts, I listened to one of the previous hosts gives me coffee and this is a guy called Dermot Crowley and he originally wrote Smart Work. And this is a productivity book and this is about using your calendar and your emails and really getting your emails kind of in check. So that is a fantastic his name's Dermot Crowley and this one is Smart Teams, which is really thinking about how you communicating that each different form of communication is different, so it needs something different. You don't do the same thing for everything. And that's really thinking about how do you want to work with your team so that they're my four books for your little collection?

Brian Kelly:
My goodness, we are off to one heck of a start. I mean, I've got to drop them now and then I'll say Why? Because those were some bomb dropping moments. If there ever was one.

Wendy Nash:
Book, they're going towards my.

Brian Kelly:
Knowledge bombs, smart bombs, Bombs of Wisdom. So here's the thing. Listen up. She already gave you a lot of advice without even giving you straight up advice. Why do I say that? She started the show with an outpouring of gratitude, and so that was the beginning of the show. And I've seen and heard and also practice myself starting every day with gratitude. And that is a great way to put your mind in a great state for the rest of the day and then keep going to it. So she's teaching without even like putting it in your face that that's what she's teaching by example already. And then she gave for fantastic resources. And I love when guests come on and give recommendations for books. And this is what I do. And I implore of everyone watching and listening to do the same. When you have somebody that's successful and you hear them talking and they offer suggestions or recommendations for books, number one, write them down. I wrote them down. I'm running the show and I'm taking notes. So I'm not doing anything. I don't I wouldn't ask. So I wrote those down. And then after the show, I'm going to go to Audible. If they're on audible format, I'm going to order them, put them in my library, and that way they're always there and know if they're my library. There was a reason for them, even if I don't remember why I put them there. And that's what I do. And that way I have read so many phenomenal books as a direct result of recommendations, just like what Wendy did. And before I go any further, I got to take care of a little bit of housekeeping, Wendy, and that is want to give a shout out to the big insider secrets that are just above her. Let's see. That would be her over her left shoulder on the right side of the screen. As you're watching the Mind Body Business show, I hope you're watching live. And if you're not, you can head over to the mind body business, show dotcom and then register to be notified when the next show airs live. And that's all we do.

Brian Kelly:
We don't sell anything. We just say, Hey, it's coming up and here's the link. All you have to do is click the link and you're in and you can participate with us. And that's what we love to share it. Share it wide and far. Give us some great ratings on the podcast. We're on everything. We're on 30 over 30 podcast platforms. You see just a smattering of them. I think they're right beneath me. And the big insider secrets. That is a company that is run by a dear friend of mine, Jason Nast, and he sponsors the show. And as a result, you can enter to win a five night stay at a five star luxury resort because of the big insider secrets. All you have to do is number one. Stay on with us, live until the end, because then I will be revealing how you can enter to win. And I hope you win. It's a phenomenon. You do not want to miss it. It's a legitimate vacation stay and then a couple more. And then we're going to get rolling like deep into it. Here we go. So if you're struggling with putting a live show together and it might be overwhelming and you want a lot of the processes possibly done for you while still enabling you to put on a high quality show, which is very important, and to connect with great people like Wendy Nash and grow your business all at the same time. Then head on over to carpet bomb marketing, carpet bomb marketing, saturate the marketplace with your message. And one of the key components that's contained in this whole carpet bomb marketing system, this is just one of many is one that you'll learn how to absolutely master. It's the very service we're using to stream our live show right here, right now on the Mind Body Business Show. And over the course of now ten years of livestreaming, I've tried so many of these, quote unquote, TV studio solutions for live streaming. I have to tell you, streaming art is the best of the best. It combines supreme ease of use along with unmatched functionality, and you can actually use them and start them and try them out for free.

Brian Kelly:
Write this down. It's our way. Peaked I am forward slash stream live IP I am forward slash stream live. Go visit that later and then you can start streaming high quality live video shows of your very own and you can just test this on your own pages and private groups and have a great time and then then take it to the next level. Live video is where it's at today and that's why Wendy is here with us right now. She is an amazing, amazing woman. I cannot wait to dive in. So we're going to do that. But first, I need to give you the introduction you so richly deserve. Wendy, I just have to do that. And so what I like to do is let everybody know a little bit more about you before we dive into that wonderful, beautiful brain of yours and see what you got going. So Wendy's company is Kindly cut the crap. I love that name. Meditation, coaching. She teaches startup founders and CEOs the art of introspection to navigate the emotionally, physically and financially taxing process of building a business. Oh, boy. How do we know about all that? Yes. She believes the CEO is the foundation of whether a company does well. And her observation is that whatever the CEO isn't owning within themselves is what gets played out at work. This is powerful. The more blindspots a person has, the less productive the workforce. It's true. It all comes down from the top. To see behind blind spots, you need to make a courageous inquiry, but do it kindly. Wendy has a four year somatic psychotherapy diploma. See that three times. Plus, her Bachelor of Psychology Honors thesis studied the effects of loving kindness meditation on prosocial behavior, and she's been practicing loving kindness and other meditations for listen to this almost 20 years. Do you think she knows what she's doing? I think so. That's why she's here. Currently, Wendy is studying a two year diploma of mindfulness and compassion at the Insight Meditation Institute. What does that tell everyone out there right now? In addition to everything, she's been doing this for 20 years.

Brian Kelly:
Did she just stop learning? No. She's going after yet another diploma and learning and going even deeper and getting even better. That is one of the things that's one of the reasons she is on this very show. She is a go getter and very successful and amazing officially, formally. Wendy Nash, welcome to the show. I'm so, so blessed to have you here. Thank you.

Wendy Nash:
So thank look, it's so lovely. And I tell you what, I've actually just been it was so interesting, you know, like, oh, yeah, that's me, isn't it? You know, like, I just I crashed and burned at school, so. I always go, I'm really. Stupid, and I'm just like going, Oh, oh. That's me. I'm one of those people who I used to go, Wow, they're amazing. And I'm like, I'm not saying I'm amazing, by the way, but I was like. Well, I've got like. Like things, you know, I think I was always a failure and everything. And I'm just like that. That person who I was, you know, like who where have I come from? That person is kind of how I've got to this place, you know? But it's, it's kind of weird to do that. But I've just been accepted into I don't know if you've heard of Tara Brack and Jack Cornfield, but they are two really amazing Buddhist teachers and they have a two year teacher training, meditation, teacher training. And one of the guest lecturers is Eckhart Tolle. So if you've ever heard of him, he wrote a book called The Power of Now. Yeah. So and there's like other amazing, amazing teachers. And I've just. And accepted into that for the next two years. And I mean, it's such a privilege to be able to be part of that. So I guess, yeah, I'm not one for. Resting on my laurels.

Brian Kelly:
You know, and that is the trait of the most successful people that I studied is, you know, look, I hear so many people talk about, you know, when are you going to retire? I said, what is retire mean? That's not even in my vocabulary. You know, as long as my heart's beating and I'm able and capable to help others, that's what I want to continue to do and to do that. I don't know. It's a drive that you and I share, I'm sure, Wendy, that we're just driven and we want to continue to improve and raise the bar. Not so much for ourselves, but for the results we get for the people that we work with and come in contact with. It doesn't even have to be transactional and money involved, and it's just helping people. And that's one of the most impressive things. There are many. And oh, by the way, I will say you are amazing.

Wendy Nash:
So thank you. Well, you, too. I want to. Say, you know. Like we've all got incredible capacities. And I think, you know, the thing that I didn't realize is that I you know, I. Was basically a big crash and burned before I not a success story, you know, like. I wasn't somebody who just felt like, wow. The world is my oyster. I was like, oh, wow. I'm just like, not whatever the opposite is. The world is my. It's there's no pearl here, you know. It's just but I guess the only thing that I did have that was in my I'm white and I'm middle class and I don't want to minimize the the just enormity of those two things which have nothing to do with the fact that I do well. I have done well in life. They are huge, huge. Blessings that I have white privilege. So I don't want to deny that. You know, I don't want to say it's just me, you know. But the only thing I think that was really in my favor is that I was absolutely open to going, Gee, I'm not doing this well at all. I'm absolutely there's something that is happening over and over and over. I can see there's a pattern, but I don't know what I'm doing, but I know I need to do it different. And so I was really keen to look around and just go, Yeah, that's a problem actually. What do I do? So that's where. I started. And that's the beginning. And you know, like it's easy to think about loving kindness is going, Oh yeah, you know, that's all soft and easy and, you know, love and teamwork. But okay. Here's a question for you, Brian. Now, you've worked for a number of years and people have pissed you off over the years. Never. Right. So now I want you to go this person. I want them to be really happy. Not because I want anything for myself. I just want them to be happy. Somebody who's really pissed you off, used you, totally just shafted you. Now I want you to go. Right. I wish this person the best of all.

Brian Kelly:
I wish this person the best of all.

Wendy Nash:
And do you feel that that is like how hard is it to do that?

Brian Kelly:
You know, I thought about it just that moment and thought, well, if I wish that person the best of all and that actually happens for them, then they will become a better person for other people as well. So I'm all in for it. Very congruent.

Wendy Nash:
But but it's not it's not natural. Right. And that's a while ago. So maybe if you had somebody yesterday who was rude in the queue, in the line in the store or something, you know, like it's like, wow, they're really rude. And then it's like, gee, I wish this person was super happy. It's it kind of goes against the grain because we all know, like, oh. It's not fair and it's really hard. So, you know, and in business, you know, there are customers who try and rip us off and there are mentors who are giving us bad advice and are investors who are very self interested. And you've just got to kind of go, Yeah, I need to be very discerning. And I think people think that discernment, lack of discernment and kindness are the same thing. But but it's not true at all. Like, if you think about somebody, you, you really, you really respect and admire. You know, they're probably someone who's really kind, but they're not they're not with sort of they're very discerning as well. And they're thoughtful a bit. Would you say that?

Brian Kelly:
That they're thoughtful?

Wendy Nash:
Yeah. And discerning and open and kind?

Brian Kelly:
Yeah, absolutely.

Wendy Nash:
But they're not a walkover.

Brian Kelly:
Hmm. Oh, no. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Yeah. They stand their space.

Wendy Nash:
Right. And that's what this work is. It's like. And it's being able to hear what is difficult and painful, maybe stuff you don't want to know. And then really just going right and learning to be kind towards ourself, towards others. So anyway. That's what I my focus is.

Brian Kelly:
I love it. I love it. Yeah. And I like you're already going down the path of mindset, right? How to think, how to react. We all have a choice in life. That's what it comes down to. We can either be pissed off forever. And how does that serve us? It doesn't. We are human. We will go through emotions. We will get upset. There's nothing wrong with that. It's okay to be human. But then, how quickly can you write the ship? How quickly can you decide, like Wendy is just saying, to change that stinking thinking so that you can then stop dwelling on the negative and move toward the positive and be more productive in all facets of your life. And so I'm curious with you, Wendy, I like to open with a question about when you get up, because you know what? Being an entrepreneur, it's super simple, right? It's like a piece of cake. It's just autopilot after, you know, it only took you ten, 15, 20 years to become an overnight success. And that was because it was so easy. I'm being totally facetious, as you can tell. But, you know, entrepreneurship is not for everyone. And there are lots of reasons why. One of them is every day we get up, we know there are going to be setbacks, there are going to be issues, they're going to be hurdles to to jump over. We may even know of an arduous test that we must get done. And it's looming in front of us. And the ones that become successful are those that choose to get past those. And I'm curious for you, Wendy, when you get up in the morning, what's going on in your beautiful brain that keeps you driven, that keeps you sane? I will never give up no matter what. And this is why and this keeps me driven no matter what I'm about to get through that day that's in front of me even that week. What is keeping you driven? Because this is very unique to each individual and I always love to find out what that is.

Wendy Nash:
It's interesting to hear that, actually, because I was thinking this morning I started a new project. I'm sort of what they call an active transport advocate, which is kind of the road, which is a public space. And that's all used, privatized with cars. You know, no one else can use it except cars that hoon. So I've been really thinking, you know, so this morning I was thinking, oh, it's all too much. I can't really do it. And then I just realized that, oh yeah, you know, it's actually just a certain amount of time that I need to focus on this, and it's not forever. And I just want to see how far I go with it. And it's not it's not failure. It's just like, oh, well, what do I what do I want in my life? Where do I want to be in ten years? What do I want to this project that I've got going, which I've just started, what do I want? How do I want to be in ten years? And I was thinking about what you were saying just then about mindset and how long are you going to be? Would you call it stinking thinking? I've never heard that before. I thought that was great. So and I was actually deeply inspired. I worked in an organization and there was a woman who was in the finance team and I had quite a bit to do with her. And she she was like, everybody would run a mile as soon as she came because she had such a temper. And I personally have quite a temper. I've had to really work with that. That's been my big it's really good being an angry. Person because you've got so much to work with. It's such a strong motivator because if people. Hate you when you're angry. Actually people are like, Oh my God, I hate this person. This person's a pain in the backside. I do not want to have anything to do with. And that reduces your efficiency actually. And it means, you know, like who doesn't want to be liked, you know, it's such a human thing anyway. So this woman, she would come down and she'd be like, she once got a whole pile of folders, like, like little manila folders.

Wendy Nash:
And she slammed it down. She said This was a waste of my time. And I had actually just split up with my partner at the time and I was very like hurt and angry and all the rest. And I thought, I am not going to be like that. So I had to learn. I had to really learn. And I was really dedicated and I had to. It was more about in every moment I had to think, what, what how is this going to be in ten years time? So I'm a great believer in use it or lose it, but I use it in a very different way. So if you want to be a really cranky, irritable person like. This finance lady, when you're old. Then you just go right ahead and you practice being angry as much as possible now, because later down the track you will have. Perfected it. Without a doubt. That will just be like. Wow, yeah, I have perfected. The art of being an asshole. If you want to be somebody who people respect, admire, come to with advice and thoughts and ideas, well, how respectful are you to yourself, to others? How kind are you to yourself to others? How much are you really engaging with what you what reality you want to have in your life? And it's like it's not all them. So this is why I love to work with entrepreneurs because there's the buck stops here. You know, I work with the people who start their businesses because actually there's no wriggle room. You can't just say it's their fault, it's the CEO's fault, it's the boss's fault, because. This is this is the deal. It's like, I've got to get my shit together. If I if it's not working out, it's my problem. So use it or lose it. If you want to use if you want to be a kind person, use it. If you want to be an angry person, use it. If you don't want to be an angry person, lose it. But it's only in this moment that you can do it. It's not later. It's not when this is finished.

Wendy Nash:
It's not when this person is out of your life. You've. I really learned that. I just made it. Ta ta, ta ta. Just shut. Excuse my very good English. Shut the fuck up. If I was going to say something which was going to be horrible, like people say. Horrible things to their partners and their children. It's like, really, what are you doing? If you want this person to love you forever and be in contact with you forever, don't say it. So that's where I had to learn. I had a foul temper. Let me tell you.

Brian Kelly:
I love it. Oh, we got a couple of people in here saying, hi, Rob Howells, welcome. Great day to you, too. From LinkedIn, David Penrose Hello from Alabama. How are you doing, David? I have a feeling I know that gentleman. I know that name. Yeah. So that was fantastic. We we talk about I mean, you're going down the same paths that I learned in neuro linguistic programing, which was how to be at cause. So basically not pointing fingers at other people and being angry at them. But is there some way somehow I could have caused or be responsible for? And even if it's an infinitesimal amount, is there some way somehow that I had something to do with their reaction or attitude? And then the other is just like you're saying, it's like, you know, you can let your circumstances control your attitude or you can let your attitude dictate your circumstances. It's a choice and we all have it equally. It's what I've found, Wendy, is this isn't surprising, but it's it's really neat. Is that the most successful people are those that do the latter. You know, they let their attitude dictate their circumstances. It doesn't mean that things won't happen to you. I'm not saying that. But when that bad thing does happen to you, use your attitude to dictate what's going to happen after that bad thing happens or that negative encounter, whatever the case may be. And then combine that with being at cause, it's very empowering. So what Wendy is saying, I hope you guys are all listening. Guys and gals are all listening intently, taking great notes, because what she's telling you is a recipe for success. Many people will just go, Oh, this is that mindset woo woo stuff. I used to be one of those. And man, when I finally woke up about ten years ago and learned this at a deep level, it is a game and life changer. So don't take what Wendy is saying lately. Please take notes and ingrain this into your being integrated into your being and start serving yourself better going forward. Is that is that kind of summing up? Okay, Wendy, you got more. I know you got more.

Wendy Nash:
I got like, oh, yeah. And then that and then I just, you know, it's so lovely to. Hear, you know, to engage one of the things, you know, and it's not finished. Like, it's not like you do a course or you do a weekend retreat or whatever, and it's finished. This is an ongoing process. So this morning I was meditating because I meditate every day, you know, I mean, I'm a meditation coach, so I'm going to do that. But it's just it's not so much because I want peace of mind. It's actually that I want to know what crap that I've kind of that is making me blind to seeing what is around me. So this morning I was meditating and I'm going, there's some quality, there's an emotion here that is consistent with all these stories that I've got going whirring through my mind. And, you know, there's a lot of a lot of things about, you know, you shouldn't have a distracted mind, you should have a clear mind, otherwise you're not meditating. But I actually like to think of it slightly differently. I think of it as a treasure hunt. It's really about that mind is kind of going nuts because there's an emotion underneath in that mix that is not being owned. And so I assume that kind of going there is something similar about all of them. I don't know what it is. What? And I then I kind of ask myself, what is the emotion common to all these thoughts? And then an hour later, I'm in the kitchen preparing breakfast and I'm like, Oh, I'm ignoring other people. Other people are ignoring me. And it sort of sets up this sense of being, you know, like, I've got to fight, I've got to really get my voice heard or whatever it is. And it's really important to kind of go, that's what I've spent my whole life kind of working with, is I feel like as a kid there was tons of stuff going on, you know, like, let's not, you know, there's tons of stuff going on. And I just felt really ignored in my pain. So I've been trying to get my voice heard ever since.

Wendy Nash:
And now that I know that that's such a big driver, it's like, Oh, is that it? Okay, now I'm more sensitive to when I ignore other people. When people say things that I don't I don't want to hear, I'm like, I'm ignoring that, actually. And that's not why that's not discerning. I'm not saying you have to take on board everything, but it's good to just observe what is here. And if somebody is saying, you know, when I was doing my psychotherapy training, one of the women said the one common denominator. She was really she had this huge family, like ten people or something. And she said, I've had relationships with men, I've had relationships with women. I've got this huge family. I've had lots of jobs. The one common denominator in all my relationships is me. What am I doing in this? I thought, Wow, that is so true. And if people are telling you the same thing over and over and over, the one common denominator in all these relationships is you. So what are you doing? And it's not about just simply, oh, well, dismissing or just kind of I'll just fix it. You've got to go into the emotion and it's not until you go into the emotion that it changes. It's like, Oh, it's really crap. Because when you're dealing with humiliation and shame and guilt and stuff, like who wants to kind of acknowledge? Actually, I felt deeply pained by the humiliation. And sometimes I'm an ass and I'm and I humiliate myself, you know, and and I don't want to go, oh, man, I was just so crap. I bad. Bad, bad. You know, like, I have to. Kind of own all that, so. And then I'm like, then it becomes like it stops being so serious. And then I go, Yeah, that guy, he messed it up too, you know? And then I'm not so judgy and blame me about how could they mess it up, you know? So yeah. I think I hope I answered the question.

Brian Kelly:
Yeah. When you're able to free yourself from those kind of thoughts that that's, it's what it does, it frees you, liberates you to now blossom right to you know, in the beginning it's like you feel like you're this beautiful flower, but you've got a bit of weeds choking you out, you know, all that negativity and the the anger and the reactions. But then when you get those weeds cleaned out of there, you're you're free to thrive and just be you and shine and blossom. And that's what I was imaging as you were talking about that. Oh, yeah. David That's right. I remember. Deborah Lady Law Speaks. Deborah Reinsdorf Yes. Good friend. The Alabama part. All right. You guys went to Alabama. I love it. Thanks for coming on. I appreciate you, brother and Wendy. My goodness. Yeah. So you're listen to what Wendy is saying again, because it's all about what's going on up here, emotions, reactions to situations. It's like you're projecting onto others what you are receiving. All right. That's what I was hearing is like, if if they're ignoring you is because you ignore other people. It's a projection that's coming back. It's like, oh, man, that's hard for us to take, too. I don't like hearing that. It's like, Well, that guy's being a jerk to me. Oh, wait, I wonder, what have I done that's just coming right back at me? It's so true, though, and it's so tough to self acknowledge when that comes up, isn't it? I mean, we're, we're ego driven beings and we don't like to know or think that we're wrong or we've done wrong. How, how is it how do you find that folks can get over that? Are there tools, techniques that you have come across and that you employ for your clients that help them to rewrite their ship, to rewire what they've been thinking all this time? You know, that stinking thinking into something nice?

Wendy Nash:
Well, I think you've just said it. You've just got to own it. Like, it's really horrible. Like, I remember when I started therapy and I. Thought I was the good guy, like, and. I always thought they're the problem. What do you call it? The weeds you call it? You know they're the problem. I'm really good and I'm really amazing even when I'm right. And I one. Time I was. Sort of awake at. 3:00 in the morning. And I was going I thought, I'll start listening to the thoughts. And I thought, yeah, I'm always the good guy. And even when I'm not a good guy, well, they should know why. I did X, Y, Z, and it's like, you know, maybe I'm not the good guy. Maybe I'm the trouble. But I did want to just put in a caveat there. I have been in a there's a family member of mine who's quite difficult. And while I have a difficult relationship with this person and I tried and tried and tried and tried and I kept thinking, well, it's me, it's me, it's me. And then I realized, actually, this is verbal abuse. So I think it's really important to say there is a point where you should maybe walk away for your own well-being. And also, if this person is actually being abusive or deeply unkind, your presence in their world, which is being which is triggering that behavior inside of them, is actually not good for them either. Hmm. So it's it's it's really wise. And this is where the discernment to be kind to yourself. And be kind with others. And I'm not saying, you know, just walk out willy nilly, but there is a really important thing where you've got to kind of. Figure out what's good and what's not for sure. For sure. There were like ten things I wanted to add. In your thing, and now I'm going, Oh, what was all that?

Brian Kelly:
I totally concur with that. You know, I've had personal relationships that I've had to walk away from for that reason. For those reasons, it was just it became toxic a little bit not horrible, but just enough to where it's like, you know, this is pulling me down and it's just not getting any better. And then recently it was a corporate relationship with another business and several people within it and the moment and it was a difficult decision to sever ties, a lot invested. And I knew that if I walked away, that investment's gone. They weren't going to do any retribution of any kind. I did that. And I got to tell you, Wendy, I mean, the moment that we got off of the back and forth messaging and it was official that I was no longer involved in it, the moment that that happened, I felt so good and so liberated. The money meant nothing to me at that moment, and it still doesn't to this day. I'm not happy about it, but it doesn't drive me like it used to. It used to be this ogre hanging over my head all the time until I got that severed and out of my life. Wow. Everything opened up. So totally concur with everything you're talking about right here for sure.

Wendy Nash:
And and what's really interesting. Thank you for sharing that story. It's a lovely story. And what's really interesting about that is that the money was the kind of what you wanted. But when it came down to would you rather have this is a really good question to ask. So in terms of your previous question, would you rather be right or would you rather be happy? And I was like, Oh, well, when I'm right, I'm happy. That was where I stood as much as I can. Very self-righteous family where everyone had a huge opinion about everything and all. I still do so. But I just realized, Hey, does it really matter? And at the end of the day, like the money hurt, like the fact that you don't have money, that money, there's no joy. There's no fun in that. Like who wants to be poor? That and poverty is not a joke, you know, it's not like bad mindset because you're poor. It's just there's a lot of complicated sociological factors that come to poverty. You know, there's there's lots of co contributors in there. But at the end of the day, actually, what you said is my well-being is more important than the money. And I think certainly in the US where it's you don't have universal health care. So I do. I'm in Australia and we have, we have a lot of it's not perfect and it's been whittled down over the decades. But it is it is here. But. But the money is not as important as we think it is. Generally speaking, as long as we've got enough to pay our rent and our medical bills and our food, then actually that's all we need. And I think it's really there's so much stuff on the social media. Be successful, make millions. I can make you millions. And it's like, wow, that's great. I'd love. To. I well, I'd love to be a millionaire. But I know Jeff Bezos, it doesn't matter how much money he has, he just wants more. So it's like, you know, how what at what cost? You know, it cost him his marriage. It cost him you know, we don't know the relationships he has, but it's like, wow, is it really worth it? That's what you're saying there. And I think that's what I like about meditation is that it's like a certain moment in the day where you go, What is really going on here? What is worth where is my time and where am I clear about? Where are my blind spots? How much am I just hooked in and just doing it because I want to be right? Would you rather be right or be happy? So there you go.

Brian Kelly:
That's kind of like my contract with my wife. That's what I say. Would I rather be right or whatever? Be happy. It's it's universal. It's awesome. Hey, I want to switch gears real quick because we haven't even touched on it. This is on me for not bringing it up yet, but we're going to now, Wendy, you have a business. You are an entrepreneur. I would like to learn more about what you do because honestly, I don't know. I've researched a little I have an idea, but I'd like to hear it straight from you. And what is it you do? What type of people or corporations do you serve? Like, what is your target market? And then by all means, if you have a success story or two or something that is profound, that you just want to let people know about related to what you do, then please, by all means do that as well. And while you do that, I'll bring it up on the screen. But this is all about ladies and gentlemen, kindly cut the crap. I love that name. So take it away, Wendy.

Wendy Nash:
It's just really interesting, just about the business name. So my thing was that I think it's really important to get to the point. Cut the wheat from the chaff. Figure out what's good. I'm, as you can tell, a very direct person. But certainly kindness is really, really essential. And and that's really what I'm down. What I'm really interested in is, you know, I worked in a lot of corporations and a lot of academic institutions and hospitals and stuff, and I just saw that people want to do well, but there's all this stuff that gets in the way of their, you know, their own ego needs and childhood yearnings and pain. And so it's really about going, well, actually, this can be different. You don't have to be a horrible person and no one's hoodwinked by any of your games and shenanigans, like don't, don't, don't play those games. And so that's why I started. And I really my focus is on entrepreneurs and startup founders and CEOs because there's this huge desire to like at the end of the day, the buck stops here when you are wrong and you make a mistake. This is because. Like you have to take responsibility for it, but it's really hard. The pressure is huge. So I like to work with these people because the mind is really engaged. It's very responsible. It's really, I want this to work. So that's that's why I like to do that. And fundamentally, I just want people to get on. I've been in so many workplaces where it's like horrible and really that just does not do anybody any favors for as long as one person is unhappy in the organization, they're like a spanner in the works, breeding, nastiness, so and gossip and back chat and all that sort of stuff and markers that that the organization isn't being managed well. And I think one of the things that is really difficult is that people are so like back to back meetings all day, every day. And I think that's why I like those smart teams. And that smart work book is because it really asks the question, What meetings do you need to be a part of?

Wendy Nash:
So, so that's what I, what I use. That's the approach I have. So I just basically try and get people to meditate and I don't actually lead the meditation generally. I just sort of go, What do you want to learn? What are you doing? What's your practice? You can choose an app, you can choose whatever you like, but what are the obstacles arising? What are the emotional challenges you're experiencing? How are you setting up the routine? So I'm really there at the support side of things to get it up and running. I don't really leave the the meditation. It's not what I'm interested in. Different people like different meditations. You just do your thing. But my best story, I just love this story. So I was actually talking with a client yesterday and this is my good news. Good, really fantastic story. So I started working with me, was a little bit interested in meditation and Buddhism and he wanted to know a little bit more. So we started working together and he was very shy and self confident, unsure about what he should do, very introverted, had had some bad experiences at school and then. And so he wanted to work with that, but he didn't want to be a horrible person. He wanted to be a really successful entrepreneur. He's in his early thirties and he he looked at those books and really thought about, well, what sort of leader does he want to be? You know, does he want to be a Jeff. Bezos or does he want to be a Dan Price? And of course, he wants to be a damn price. But so in the beginning, he was quite nervous. He tried this start up. He actually left his really well-paid job too soon. This is a big problem with founders. Is there actually think they are ready earlier than they are? That you need to do a lot of a lot of double work and double side job for a lot. It's like years and years. If you do it sooner than that, it's too soon. And he really engaged with the ideas, with Buddhism, with meditation.

Wendy Nash:
It took in the beginning. He's like, Oh, it's so hard to get to 10 minutes and then 12 minutes and then 15 minutes, and then he's like, Oh, I can't get to 20. And I was going, Okay, so just do 16 minutes. And he said, I'll do 17. And then he kind of realized it was all a game in his own mind. And now his he went back to the organization he left, he was on a contract role and conditions were actually heaps better. And he's just been he did manage some projects really well, much better than if he had stayed and he used all the principles in the books. And then he now has been given these really high profile, complex projects to work on. And his boss is like his profile is he's he's like he's just going through the roof. So and he does that because of the meditation, because he's like, I know now when I don't meditate, I'm just not as I'm not able to see things the MUDD So so so well and he gets on better with his family. He gets on better with his friends and he's more discerning about who he chooses his time with, what he does with his time. He's healthier. He's kinder always. And he hasn't really changed. He was already a nice guy, but he wasn't having the business success. Now he's really got the business success. He's seen very well from his by his boss. He's going to be a star for sure.

Brian Kelly:
Yeah, I love that. Yeah, I was a former personal certified personal trainer. And that's the same thing with the body. When you work out, when you exercise, you're, you're like in alignment. It just it's like a reset, an amazing thing. And I always say the mind and body. We're a team. And so working out your mind and your in your sense, where you meditate and you take care of the mind, you exercise the mind gently and wonderfully. Now you have a team that's banging on all cylinders that are both in the same game, which makes it a lot easier for you to achieve more. So I really resonate with what you're saying about the meditation in this gentleman and how does that feel to you, having had a part in changing that man's life?

Wendy Nash:
I mean, it's super cool. It's just really nice. It's really like, you know, he's he did the work. I mean, I tell lots of people about the books and things like that, and there are lots of people about meditation and some of them take it sort of more, more how would I say, is it to heart or something? They really apply it, really just take it response. But he was hungry for that knowledge and so he absolutely applied that and that that's what makes it. Yes, I introduced him and it's beautiful to watch. And but it's him who did the work. All I did was tell him about a couple of books. You know, that's him who did the work.

Brian Kelly:
I have a feeling you did a little bit more than that.

Wendy Nash:
I unpacked a few, few blind. Spots and I keep him on track. Like I don't let. Him get away with anything, you know? I'm just like, Yeah, you. Got to be careful of, like, the mirror and being, like, judging people who aren't as ambitious and being kind of like self righteous. Like, you've got to keep that in check. These are the markers of what you're doing. I'm not. Like that. Only those people over there are like that. That's like.

Brian Kelly:
I love it. I love it. Wendy Nash, you are amazing. We're getting near the end of the show, which always saddens me. It always comes so daggone fast. I did promise everyone that I would show them how they could enter to win a five night stay at a five star luxury resort. We're going to do that in just a moment. And Wendy, what I like to do on this show is I close the show with every guest with the same question. And the interesting it kind of started by accident. It actually did. I would ask it on occasion and I started realizing, hey, that's a pretty profound answer. Hey, that was another pretty profound answer. And I thought, you know what? I'm just going to make that part of how we end this thing. It's really profound. It's it can be a little personal. And I'll explain that more in a bit. Don't worry, there's no big deal to it. But before we do that real quick, everyone watching and listening, get out your pens. You're going to write this down. You're not going to go there right now. You don't need to. We will pick a winner after the show is over. So you have plenty of time. So I'm going to put it up on the screen and read it. This is for those of you watching live. Remember, if you're not watching live, all you have to do is go to the mind body business, show dot com and register and you'll get notification notified. The next time we go live. We go live at least once a week, sometimes twice, and we don't sell or pitch anything from those notifications. So here it is. I'm going to put it up on the screen. So write this down. What you want to do after the show is over is go to our IP dot. I am forward slash vacation guest experts are allowed to enter as well R.I.P. dot im that's you Wendy forward slash vacation. And I got to tell you there you're going to see an amazing, amazing choice of places to visit. It's all over the world.

Brian Kelly:
The vacation stay is completely complimentary. All you have to do is get the travel to and from and pay resort fees. And all of that is explained once you are declared the winner. And yes, you can travel to someplace somewhat nearby. So you travel expenses are minimized as well. You have lots of choices. You don't want to miss this. Go to report. I am for vacation. After the show is over, write it down and we know when our live show finishes. So if you're listening to this later and you enter, we'll have an idea that you weren't watching life. So I wouldn't go that route. So that's it. Go ahead and do that. And now we're going to get back to the woman of the hour, Wendy Nash, and we're going to ask her that one final, juicy, profound question. I cannot wait.

Wendy Nash:
Oh, my God. I'm so scared. I'm so scared. What's he going to ask me? Yeah.

Brian Kelly:
And here's the beautiful thing about Wendy. There is no such thing as a wrong answer to this question. And it's actually just the opposite. The only correct answer is yours. And that's all that makes it personal. It just makes it unique to you. That is it. And so some will have the answer like bam immediately. Others take some time and ponder. That too is perfect. There's nothing wrong either way because it's your answer. It makes it absolutely 100% perfectly correct. So there's nothing to lose. Are you ready?

Wendy Nash:
Ready, set, go.

Brian Kelly:
All right. Wendy Nash, how do you. Define. Success.

Wendy Nash:
I think it is. Let me think about that, because I'm not a very financially minded person. Like, I'm not I'm not all about the money. What do I think is success? I think it's really just a sense of peace within. That we feel like we have what we need. That we live a life of dignity, that we are kind to ourselves and others, that we are thoughtful in our interactions. Gosh, it sounds so earnest and boring. Gosh, I'm so, so like, oh crap. I mean, I don't know. Like, I think just just. I don't know. What do I think is success? I just think it's being just nice and simple and straightforward and not up yourself. There you go.

Brian Kelly:
I love it. You know how that's going to end, don't you hear it? Come. Yes.

Wendy Nash:
Oh.

Brian Kelly:
Nothing out of the way of the dropping smart bombs, knowledge, bombs, bombs of wisdom. Wendy Nash, you have been an absolute joy to talk to today. I appreciate you for coming on. One of the wonderful things I've noticed about everyone I've had on the show that answer that question to a person, not one, not and I've been doing this. We're well over 200 shows three years. Not one single person said it was about money. You said the first thing you said is, I'm not about the money. It's not about that. And it's often the very first thing that you say is the true one, and yours was to have a sense of peace. That kind of kind of encapsulated everything else you said after. So it was beautiful. So and that's the thing that's unique to you and it's amazing. The other thing it's amazing to me, Wendy, is after doing this all these years, no two people yet have answered that question the same exact way. It's kind of mind blowing to me. You would think, how do you find success? There'd be 20 people say the same thing. That's why it's how we end our show. And speaking of that, that's a very sad thing. But we must do that because it is time to shut her down for the night. But I just wanted one last time to tell you, Wendy, I truly appreciate you. You're a blessing. And thank you for coming on all the way from Queensland. Australia. Ooh, this is amazing. So thank you so much. Do you have one final parting word of advice for anyone? Let's go to your target market, those that are just doing their starting up their own business as a CEO, what would one piece of advice in one sentence be to that person, if you could think of it right now?

Wendy Nash:
When you've got a problem, bring it to mind. Go for a run, clean the house, meditate, whatever it is that you want to do and just say, What am I not saying about this?

Brian Kelly:
Boom. Ah, bom.

Wendy Nash:
Bom. And I was moving out of the way because I got my picture at the back of the space. Comes from San Francisco. My friend, my really good friend gave it to me from San Francisco and it had. A fold down the middle. So I thought, I'm just going to make it a window. So it's actually why it's got a little frame in the middle.

Brian Kelly:
I love it. I love it. Shout out to the friend from San Francisco. Thank you for that. All right. On behalf of the amazing Wendy Nash, I am Brian Kelley, the host of the Mind Body Business Show. Until next time, keep crushing. It keeps serving others. And above all, be blessed all. Have a great, great evening. We'll talk to you and see you again very soon. Thank you for tuning in. To the. Mind Body Business. Show podcast. At www.TheMindBodyBusinessShow.com My name is Brian Kelly.

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Wendy Nash

Wendy's company is Kindly Cut The Crap meditation coaching. She teaches startup founders and CEOs the art of introspection to navigate the emotionally, physically and financially taxing process of building a business. She believes the CEO is the foundation of whether a company does well and her observation is that whatever the CEO isn't owning within themselves is what gets played out at work. The more blind spots a person has, the less productive the workforce. To see behind blind spots, you need to make courageous inquiry, but do it kindly. Wendy has a 4-year somatic psychotherapy diploma, her Bachelor of Psychology Honors thesis studied the effects of loving-kindness meditation on prosocial behavior and she's been practicing loving-kindness and other meditations for almost 20 years. Currently, Wendy is studying a 2-year diploma of Mindfulness & Compassion at the Insight Meditation Institute.

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